There's not doubt we have a spending problem but remember that this blog is about "the struggles to have self control with credit cards, and the joys of paying them off". From time to time I go back and look at some of our credit card purchases. Below is a statement from March, as you can see someone decided to go to Las Vegas. There was another Vegas trip the last week of May (wife only) and let's just say that statement looks way worse than this one.
March 2011:
Keeps going...
Second page...
Almost there...
I'm not allowed to say life happens, I think I've used that one too many times. I wonder if we are the only people in the world that spend like this. I swear people around me spend way more... any others out there??
HS
29 comments:
Couple of things I noticed...putting the Vegas trip aside for a minute.
1) Lots of little purchases...$1.84 popped up several times. $2 here, $5 there. I am going to guess alot of those are impulse purchases (coffee, lunch, etc).
2) I didn't add it all up....but do you use this one card for EVERYTHING you do?
3) Round numbers. $25. $20. Maybe Gas?
If your card has the option, can you graph out your purchases, and see where you are actually spending your money? If I had to guess...ALOT of it is food.
Also, notice how many times in one day you use your card. And look at it...HARD...and ask yourself how much of it was NEED.
But to answer your question....we don't use our card that way. Never have.
That's correct a lot of those purchase are stuff like coffee and lunch...
Yes this is the only card that we both carry but Discover also used to get abused the same way...
Those 20 and 25 charges are for my bus... I wonder if I can deduct those on my taxes?
Yes a lot of it is food but our rule is to eat dinner at at least 5 nights a week. I love to cook but the downside is spending 150 every time I hit the grocery store.
HS
HS - it appears that you are trying to keep up with others in your life that spend. Has the thought occurred to you that they might be in debt as well? And as for your comment about the grocery store - how the heck do you spend $150.00 each and every time? That's my food budget for the week, which includes the occasional dining out.
No clue why groceries are expensive but that $150 usually lasts 10 days... this week was $189! I needed coffeee and detergent.. so that was an extra 25
HS
Oh I can relate. It is because of the spike in gas prices finally is showing up in our food prices.
It might help to write down every time you use a credit card so you have a running tally through out the month. That way you can choose an amount per month that covers all your necessary purchases and some fun purchases, and when you approach that number, slow down or stop spending. To compare, we are a family of 5 and we earmark about $1800/month for groceries, gas, entertainment, clothing, and miscellaneous purchases.
Good luck getting on top of your spending!
Something I've noticed is that anytime anyone asks you a question about your finances your answer is always "I don't know" or "I have no clue" or "I don't have any idea".
You just spend and spend and spend and don't even think about it until you have your once-every-6-week freakouts about debt. Then you swear never to spend again and to pay off $1000 a month.
That lasts for a few weeks until you go back to spending and spending and spending without thinking. And then again it's "that's life" and "I don't know".
There is a LOT more spending going on than you're sharing with us here. I know the area you live in, I know roughly what you do and how much it pays. Your wife probably doesn't make as much as a teacher, but even so, with your combined incomes, you have to be making close to 6 figures, if not over.
I'm not saying you have to share everything with us here. But what you share of your credit card debt is barely the tip of the iceberg of the spending you do, if you can't afford to pay off what you spend each month.
Maybe you need to sit down and actually write out everything you spend. Yes, the dreaded B word - Budget. Until you stop saying "I have no clue where my money goes", nothing is ever going to change for you.
Frugal,
That's pretty much it other than bills like mortgage etc... some months everything goes on the CC and I just pay it back...
Here is the income:
http://www.ourdebtblog.com/2009/04/about-us.html
HS
A couple bloggers have been doing a seven day spending fast. NO spending, of ANY kind, for seven days. It's only seven little days but it might open your eyes in a huge way. I think you should try it! What's there to lose? Here's an explanatory post: http://halfdozendaily.wordpress.com/2011/06/29/fiscal-fast-anyone/
P.S. Why aren't you tracking your spending yet?
Hi Mutant,
I can do 7 days... but not sure about the wife LOL and I don't want to bring up finances to her right now (still cleaning up the mess lol)
HS
Sad to look back at last July:
http://www.ourdebtblog.com/2010_07_01_archive.html
In one post/comment thread you say that your wife just charges and spends like you do. Then in this post/comment thread you say that you won't bring up the subject of cutting back on spending with your wife because want to "clean up the mess".
I'm trying to believe that you're a smart person, but it's hard when you say stuff like this.
"I have to fix this before I can talk to my wife about it but my wife is part of the problem so I can't fix it because I can't ask her to stop spending because I can't tell her why she needs to stop spending so I need to fix it first but ... "
Until you:
A - come clean with your wife and ask for her PARTNERSHIP in managing your finances
B - start tracking your spending and KNOWING where you spend your money instead of answering "I have no clue" to the questions
C - stop spending money
... none of this will ever end.
Play the same tune until you go broke or die. Because until you use the brains you have, this will never "get fixed". And I think you're the only person here who doesn't see that.
In response to your link above, if you actually make $120k between the two of you, then what you're posting is NOT what you're spending. It can't be. Even figuring VERY conservatively, your take home each month should be over 6k. That's after taxes, deductions, etc.
What are you doing with 6k+ each month that you can't pay off your credit card bill in full at the end of the month?
I spend about $500 a month on groceries to feed my two boys (ages 13 and 8), myself, and lunches and snacks for 3 daycare kids. We eat very little processed food, and I make lots of stuff (like all our bread) from scratch. I also buy about 50% organic food. This amount also includes all household items (like supplies to make laundry soap, vinegar and baking soda to clean, and shampoo.) It does not include eating out.
I know your post is not about this, but I think you can cut back in so many ways.
Start by spending only cash!!!
Frugal,
That's about right... that leaves close to 2000 per month to to pay back on debt.
HS
HS - If I had that extra a month like you, my debt would be GONE!
Easier said than done! I swear stuff comes up!!
HS
Meaning 'Life Happens'? Sorry HS - I don't buy it. If you were really serious about this, then get counseling AND include the wife. She is a huge part of this issue.
I'm beginning to think this is a troll site; no one of average or better intelligence could possibly be this clueless unless it is willful. Still, I'll keep reading, because of the horible-train-crash-can't-tear-eyes-away schadenfreude. Still, I don't think there's any point to offering thoughtful advice at this juncture.
So you spend $4000 on mortgage, utilities, food, and gas? Does that include minimum payments on debt?
I am sorry, but $2000 of "stuff" every month doesn't happen.
Is this blog for real?
If it is, then yeah, you guys are the types who really shouldn't be using credit cards at all. But it also sounds like deep down this is really not a priority for you. You seem to enjoy more writing about all the shiny things you're spending money on than anything else. Saying you feel guilty about spending doesn't actually make it ok.
Honest to God you guys need to cut up those credit cards and call the companies to close them off. And maybe seek counseling for whatever it is that forces these purchases you don't really want to make to just magically come up. But given it's been two years of the exact same thing... I sort of doubt that is going to happen either.
Stuff comes up? Is that the new version of "life happens"?
$150 worth of booze at a bar "comes up"? You can't say no?
Two trips to Vegas in a year "come up" and you can't choose not to go?
Buying a $500 phone because you broke the old one "comes up" and you can't buy a cheaper or used phone?
A $300 purse "comes up" and you can't make a choice not to buy it?
I could keep going for pages and pages of this stuff.
I call bullshit on all of that. The bottom line is that you really don't WANT to be out of debt. I really do think you enjoy the responses you get here - you enjoy making people incredulous and shocked at your financial stupidity. @thelostgoat is right. You're just a troll getting off on this stuff and reading it is like watching a train wreck over and over and over again. I can't seem to tear myself away even though I know I should.
Frugal
It's all real... if you don't like it don't read it ;)
HS
I think other people do spend like this...but not PF bloggers or people who are serious about paying off debt. In fact, many of them are probably in debt too. This isn't the place for sympathy on how "things keep coming up" since you don't talk about emergencies, but things you want. I hope you can work it out, but it takes making some changes that you don't seem willing to make.
Reread your own first sentence, HS: "... remember that this blog is about the struggles to have self control with credit cards, and the joys of paying them off."
There are no "struggles to have self control" here. There are only excuses and avoidance and weaseling out of responsibility. Any time anyone asks you a hard question about a choice you made, you just skip over it and never answer, unless you blow it off with "life happens".
I've read all your older posts and in them I've never seen you take any responsibility for your spending or your debt. You always brush off the fact that you chose to spend money with "that's life" or "stuff comes up". Changing your excuse phrase doesn't change the fact that you make choices, (including the choice to lie to your wife about money, which is a whole other thing).
If you want sympathy for how "things keep coming up", you're probably not going to get it in the PF world - at least from those who are serious about their finances. Really, lame excuses and lack of accountability do nothing more than mock and demean the PF bloggers who truly are struggling and working to change their lives and their situations.
You're right .. if I don't like it I don't have to read it. But I'm just kinda baffled by this whole blog to be honest.
Well keep in mind that I paid off 14,000 in credit card debt on this blog! yes once upon a time I was cc debt free but slowly came back to 11k...
HS
HS - you let yourself get back into debt, and you let your wife do whatever she wants to keep her happy. Wrong choice.
You need DAVE RAMSEY ASAP!
I know Dave LOL I've read his book many times...
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