My Mom: We went to The Petroleum Club brunch in Houston. This event is for member's only but let's just say I was invited and luckily I didn't have to pay anything other than valet parking tip. The food was great, the desserts OMG! I even found the invitation online:
Her Mom: This one was a bit more pricey. They came over to the house around 11 AM so we had to buy a couple of bottles of champagne to toast, that was around $50. Then my wife took her parents out to brunch to a local restaurant. I don't remember the name but I do remember the total. I think she spent somewhere around $200 with tips. They ordered off the menu and had a few drinks and dessert so that's probably why that bill was a bit high.
Well there you have it, Mother's Day set up back close to $300. Mom's we love you, we hope you had a great time!
HS
9 comments:
You "had" to buy champagne?
You "had" to take them out for a $200 meal?
You "had" to buy gift cards?
You say you love spending time celebrating with family, but that's not spending time with your family. That's buying them off. You didn't "have" to do any of that. You could have spent much less money and had a lovely time with your respective moms celebrating them instead of throwing money at them.
$300 on mother's day is ludicrous.
Until you quit making excuses that you "had" to spend money, you'll never get out of debt.
YES... we 'had' to that's what they expect and they take care of us when it comes to birthday and Christmas, not to mention all the other times we drop in for dinner.
HS
Wow, you two are generous! I'm sure your moms deserve it. It's interesting to see how different families operate though. We went to my mom's house. I made pasta salad and rice crispy treats, my sister made a simple green salad. Got my mom a gift card to get her hair done ($40 each), and got my grandma some mugs she wanted ($25 each). My sister and I both made our cards with our own two little hands. I would say I spent no more than $20 on the food.
This is not a criticism, just a note on different family expectations. I think it's much harder to be frugal when others would see it as stingy, even when you see it as practical.
Blogger is giving me a hell of a time with comments.
Ms. Kara's onto something & you're missing the point. You don't have to do anything you don't want to do. You didn't have to spend any of that money, you wanted to spend it. Here's the thing about gifts & giving. Shift the focus to why you're giving instead of what & how.
Your mothers do the things they do because they love you, you're their children, & (hopefully) because they're in a position to be generous. This doesn't mean you have to match them dollar for dollar, action for action. You don't show a person their worth and value in dollars, gift cards, or food.
Just because you have been doing something a particular way for so long, doesn't mean it's the only way to do things. You've stuck yourselves in a mold & keep yourselves there. No one is holding you to it.
You think Mom's going to disown you if you don't spend lavishly on her? She may be offended but communication & time heals all wounds. You may have to eat some humble pie & explain to Moms 1 & 2 what's going on but a little humble pie has never hurt anyone.
Was Mother's Day talked about with your wife in advance? Why wasn't there a budget put in place? Because she'd throw it out the window? That's not right if it's something you two come to agreement on together. And if she won't even come to the table? If that's the case, you have MUCH bigger problems than a few thousand dollars in debt & a spending problem my friend.
They're a bit demanding lol and they expect a lot from us kids... like I said not a holiday I enjoy when it comes to money but they do a lot of for us.. will my mom disown me.... probably lol they love drama!
Could it have been planned in advance? probably but that's what expected to spend, life happens!
HS
Ah .. the famous response you always give: Life happens.
You use that to abdicate all responsibility don't you? Every time someone calls you out on stupid spending, your response is life happens.
What happened to: "I have a great marriage where my spouse doesn't need Louis Vuitton and I'm mature enough to realize I can't have the toys I want (motorcycles,atv's etc) because family and financial responsibility comes first." (Hint, that's one of your very own comments from earlier in this blog)
Didn't your spouse who doesn't need LV just drop $300 you don't have on a Coach bag?
Life doesn't "happen". You choose to make the life you live. You have chosen debt. Until you grow up and truly ARE mature enough to realize that you cannot afford your lifestyle, you'll never get out of debt. And I hope to god that you don't lose your job or have a true emergency or medical situation. Because the whole house of cards will come tumbling down in a hurry.
Wow, very generous! I told my daughter she could only spend $20 on me.
She bought me a new frying pan (my old one wasn't non-stick anymore), 2 workout shirts, a paring knife to stock in my new office kitchen, a grocery list pad that sticks to your refrigerator and a package of cool pens - I will use each and everything she gave me and she didn't have to break the bank.
Kara - you are my hero!!
HS - Seriously???? Really???
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